Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Guest Post with Krystal Wade

Krystal Wade

Now I've spoken before about some of the great people I've met over the phenomenon of Twitter.  Well, one of them is a brilliant writer called Krystal Wade, and not only she is a terrific writer, she is also a terrific blogger.  Every time I visit her blog HERE, I know I am in for a treat.  I get to pretend I live in Virginia, that I commute 50 miles each day to work, that I am there in her kitchen when the offspring are getting up to high drama, or those wonderful times when Krystal shares with us memories about growing up in a different place, in a different time, but with the common denominator, the human condition.

Krystal is the first person to do a guest post at 120 Socks, so already you know I hold her in very high regard.  So when I asked her to come up with an idea for posting, the sky was the limit!  Like all my brill friends, Krystal has a quirky and often slightly wicked sense of humour.  Was I surprised when she suggested an 'Ode to a Toilet' - of course not - I just wanted to laugh out loud, and settled myself back for an entertaining read, which is exactly what you are now going to get!  Just to say here, the inspiration for this came to Krystal when she spotted an abandoned toilet by the road.  Which just goes to prove - Inspiration is everywhere!

Ode to the Toilet

In the 50’s you were quite a sight—sea-foam green, all shiny and new. Our friends would comment on your beauty when they’d come for a visit, and I just knew they enjoyed your comfort when they sat on you.

On the weekends I’d scrub and polish you clean, although no rings around your bowl could be seen. Your color was like no other. Our neighbors whispered their jealousies and our status rose as the years passed by.

The 60’s came and went and you were still a hit, but in the 70’s my thoughts turned traitorous and I wished you’d turn orange. I dreamed of painting your porcelain, but my darling husband didn’t agree. He said, “Times change, green will be popular again—you’ll see.” I listened to him, but jealousies were now mine to be had. I’d touted my status around, but it was gone and I was sad.

The 80’s began and I continued to cry, but times were changing and there was no reason why. Wild colors popped up everywhere, on people’s clothes and in their hair. Your stray from the norm would make people coo when they’d open the door to go poo.

Our excitement at your return in popularity continued through the 90's, but something was different, something was wrong.  We must have known; we had to have seen this coming all
along.  the century turned and people wanted simple, but we were old and didn't know, that toilets should be white as snow.
So on this day, I’m sad to say, you must go out with the trash. In with the new, out with the old—you’ll probably grow a whole lot of mold, and if you do, it’ll be okay, cause your sea-foam green and will be hidden away.

You can find more about Krystal by clicking on the following links:

Twitter: @KrystalWade 

Check out 120 Socks Guest Post with Krystal all about Writing Rituals @ http://tinyurl.com/5t53j5f



  1. This is SOOOO appropriate, Krystal, given our, AHEM!, toilet talk on Twitter yesterday. Well done!

  2. Very funny I'm not sure if it's meant to be but I've only slept 3 hours! Very desciptive & fun to read. As soon as I read "Ode to Toilet" u had me hooked, as I love quirky things. Hope this makes sense as I'm way toooo tired to proof read lmao

  3. I found it funny, but interesting too, as a piece of social comment.

  4. I must say this piece made me reminisce about the 50's, 60's, 70's, and then the disco 80's. From our wringer washer in the 50's and 60's to our avocado green and harvest gold kitchen appliances in the 70's, and 80's that went along with our shag carpets and lava lamps in a myriad of colors that were in the 80's complemented by our disco balls, strobe lights, and black lights. And of course if you smoked weed during the time the colors and experiences were well... let's just say - much more enhanced!

  5. Very cool!! K.Wade has a way with words. Had me smiling the whole way through. Who knew toilets could be SO entertaining!!!

  6. We may be miles apart but girrrrl it is the same story here in Ireland. We had a green toile when I was a kid....my mom hated it by the late mid 80's

  7. coloured toilets, what was all that about we say now,but at the time!
    Never seen a brown one?
    good happy vibe to it, i liked it.

  8. Thanks for all the comments guys. This was so much fun to write. I worried that it was a bit over the top, but your responses are priceless. :-)


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